we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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