Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
