Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
