worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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