i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize