cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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