it was like eating out sand paper
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Randomize
