i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
