No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
