Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
