are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Randomize
