Kiss
Puke
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Randomize
