Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Randomize
