Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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