I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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