I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
