you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
How external is "for external use only"?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
