She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I pour the whiskey from now on
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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