Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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