New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Randomize
