Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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