1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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