Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I am never drinking with the goths again.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
