My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
