Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
