hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
