That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Who died my cat blue again?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
