i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
