I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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