You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I see more hoeing in ur future
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