You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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