O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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