How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Randomize
