We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
She said her name was "party"
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
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