i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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