so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
