Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
