i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
