he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Are we still banned from the library?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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