If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
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