glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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