dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
