I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
