Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
