its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
