As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
