im having a threesome with these popsicles
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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