Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Randomize
