we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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