I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You ate ashes out of my bong
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
